


Faith In You

by samidha



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 2008, Community: Sweet Charity, F/M, POV Sam Winchester, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-11-01
Updated: 2008-11-01
Packaged: 2018-12-04 15:42:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11558289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samidha/pseuds/samidha
Summary: Written for Sweet Charity in 2008. Slices of life between Sam and Jess, Sam-POV.





	Faith In You

Sam really hates being Dean's brother. He knows the precise moment that his body and mind start behaving according to Dean-logic--which is to say no logic at all.

He's just standing against the grey cinderblock side of the dorm, all one-duffle-bag's worth of his stuff "moved in" in all its glory, when the little red truck pulls up. Just pulls up, rusted rims and all, like it belongs there with all the pristine Volvos and BMWs, and out of it steps a tall blonde. Sam knows she'd make Dean do a double-take and then he'd ignore her for the rest of the night; too dangerous. Sam should do that too, except he's just kind of lost with his blood pumping so hard in his veins. And he thinks DeanDadDeanHome and it's all over. 

And she's beautiful. Sam pulls himself away from the wall and swallows, slips up to her feeling gangly and stupid. She's tall, with legs long enough she could have run track in high school, maybe even college. She would have been really good at it, even if Sam could still run circles around her. He files this away as a topic never to engage too deeply in, but he can still enjoy--

Jesus, what the hell is he doing? Acting like Dean. He is so screwed. 

She looks him up and down and he has to say something, and fast.

"Uh, hi. Nice truck?"

She laughs, loud, eyes skimming over the tops of the other cars. "Really?"

"Scout's honor," he says, going for broke.

She smiles at him, lights up like maybe he's what she's looking for, too, and it warms him from the inside as he shoulders a pair of her bags and follows her up to her room.

_They learn every curve and plain of each other's bodies. He pulls those long legs up over his shoulders and every inch of her is his to touch. He doesn't let the opportunity go to waste._

_Sam can make her toes curl just by running his hands along her inner thighs, teasing with a finger or his tongue into the crease of her hip. He makes a point of learning everything he can do before he even brings his hands or the tip of his cock to the folds of her vulva. He takes pride in just how he can send her squirming. But he never makes her beg._

*~*~*

Sam tries not to think back to the time he spent here without Jess. When he does, he wishes he could slip her backwards into those long months with nothing but an ache in his chest and a list of phone calls he can't make. There was the work, but that could only occupy his mind for so long. There was always too much empty, lonely time. 

Now he fills as much time as he can with Jess at his side, making memories, spinning a life for himself that he can actually be proud of. 

She seems to understand. There are things she doesn't ask anymore. When she gets that concerned look on her face and stops just short of asking, he offers her a grateful smile--Yeah, I know, I'm a trainwreck. Humor me--and kisses the confusion off of her face, leaving her lips full and her face flushed. She laughs. 

They both know exactly what he's doing--Nice one, Sam, really subtle deflection there--but she always laughs, lets it drop, sinks into the moment with him. More than once, they have to give up studying and dash back to his dorm. Jess hangs on his arm the whole way, her laughter filling the air, and Sam loves her so much it might even hurt a little.

Sam might just be the luckiest person alive if these are the consequences for his lies of omission. 

_Sam looks down at Jess, spread out like a cat in a puddle of sun and still murmuring appreciation. She's glowing with contentment and it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. Somehow, he's responsible for her looking that way in this moment._

_She reaches up, pulls him down into a kiss. Her lips are so full. He lets himself slip down beside her and burrows close. When she looks like this, he can forget the guilt. He focuses on her face, the smile he helped put there and he thinks, yeah. He's goddamn lucky. And it's really okay._

*~*~*

They've made a reputation for themselves within their circle of friends. Sam rolls his eyes when Jeremy teases him: "You're in my phone as Jess' Sam."

Becky grins into her rum and coke, pushes a finger into the air. She slams her drink on the table and a little sloshes over the side. "He so is! I'm only calling you that from now on!"

"Yeah, do that," he says. He plays up being annoyed, but he can't hold back a real laugh.

Sam spent two years here without really knowing anyone. Now he's got more people than he knows what to do with, all telling him it's Jess who brought them.

He thinks of how nervous she was, how he'd been nervous for her, too, thinking of how things were here for him at first. They were two peas in a tiny pod, far from at home in the posh Stanford crowd, but Jess could light up the room at a funeral. He'd known it then and he definitely knows it now. 

He rolls his eyes but everyone knows he's exactly where he wants to be.

_Sam lets her scratch her name into his back. He focuses on his breathing and doesn't let himself move. With her mark on him, she lets him fuck her. Sam's eyes glint in the light of the single bedside lamp as he takes her slow, so slow, until she lets out a little growl and he smiles._

_"Want you to remember this," he says, but he speeds up._

_Her nails dig into his sides, sending a shiver through him above her, and she grins._

_"You know I will."_

*~*~*

Five months, three days and twelve hours later, Jess can't remember anything because Jess is in the ground. Sam did that to her, too. He doesn't understand it, but he knows at least that much. If they're lucky, Jess won't remember. They shouldn't be that lucky, but after a week there's no sign that she's haunting anywhere. At least she's been shown that small mercy.

Jess won't remember, but Sam won't let himself forget.


End file.
